Raise the Titanic

[Kris Johnson]

I watched Raise the Titanic (1980) last night, not because I was hoping to be entertained, but because I think we might actually want to do it some day.

Well, guess what? They got it wrong. Apparently, when Clive Cussler wrote the original novel, the common belief was that the ship had remained intact as it sank and was just lying there all cozy as can be on the bottom of the Atlantic. Turns out the actual RMS Titanic broke into two pieces, so the methods employed in the movie are completely useless.

So, now we have to figure out how to raise two half-ships from 12,500 feet. Any suggestions?

Oh, and Richard Jordan as Dirk Pitt? Who thought that would be a good idea? Duncan Idaho, sure; Dirk Pitt, not so much. And where the heck was Rudy Gunn? And Al Giordino? FAIL.

[Nycteris]

I am disappointed, but I guess you do have to consider when it was produced.
 
I really liked Sahara, though - anyone read any Cussler novels? I am considering whether to read some. My dad seems to like them.

Hmm, maybe you could train some of your pet kraken to raise the thing.

[Kris Johnson]

I am disappointed, but I guess you do have to consider when it was produced.
 
I really liked Sahara, though - anyone read any Cussler novels? I am considering whether to read some. My dad seems to like them.

Hmm, maybe you could train some of your pet kraken to raise the thing.

Cussler novels hover on the edge of that whole "men's adventure" genre (which includes The Executioner and The Destroyer). It's been several years since I read any of them (I've been meaning to re-read Sahara for some time now), but I'm not sure a contemporary audience would appreciate how Pitt treats women, at least in the early novels. It's possible that I'm blending my men's adventure novels here, so I'll come back with a more detailed report after I finish that re-read.

[Kris Johnson]

Hmm, maybe you could train some of your pet kraken to raise the thing.

Though we do have one giant squid (Petunia), we're not currently equipped to train more. If only there were some sort of ocean-based scientific platform to whom we could sublet that work.

[Nycteris]

Such wonderful toys!

[Natalie Metzger]

Though we do have one giant squid (Petunia), we're not currently equipped to train more. If only there were some sort of ocean-based scientific platform to whom we could sublet that work.

I have it on good authority that there is some sort of ocean-based scientific platform to whom you could sublet that work. In fact, I've also heard that they might have some sort of giant squid accelerated training device. You should look into that. I think there's even an advertisement in the latest edition of MWAAHHAHAHAA! Magazine.

[vandermore]

I think there's even an advertisement in the latest edition of MWAAHHAHAHAA! Magazine.

Do you have a link or address for that magazine? My subscription lapsed and one of my minions used the saved issues as ballast one day. I wasn't able to recover the old issues, but I do say that minions make for good ballast substitutes.

[Natalie Metzger]

Do you have a link or address for that magazine? My subscription lapsed and one of my minions used the saved issues as ballast one day. I wasn't able to recover the old issues, but I do say that minions make for good ballast substitutes.

I do not. We usually get an Twofish encrypted message once a month containing the randomly generated URL where the digital version of the magazine can be accessed on the first new moon of each lunar cycle (as we have a electronic subscription). I'd be happy to fill out the "Send a fiend friend a FREE issue" form that they usually include on the back cover. Just make sure to keep an eye out for a jet powered ox-cyborg (it is the year of the ox, right?) with your free issue embedded in its neural net.

[vandermore]

Excellent, thank you. I do have to say I am glad that it will be embedded in it's neural net and not in something else. I'll just leave it at that.