The Secret Lair

So, there was this Comic-Con thing. Or, as some might say, “geek prom”. Yes, it had vast serpentine lines of costumed fans. Yes, the rooms were turgid with unwashed humanity. But much to my delight, it was quite the fun time.

It is true that one cannot appreciate the size of the convention until one actually goes there, but I found that a big part of enjoying the craziness is best summed up in Cmar Comic-Con Lesson (CCCL) #1: be Taoist. It is nigh impossible to “rush” from one area to another with the crush of people involved, especially if your goal is on the other side of the convention center, or one of many things offsite, where “offsite” is usually the downtown area across train tracks that forms a massive, slowly navigable bottleneck at peak times. Make sure to allot enough time to attempt to do the things you want, and if you miss out on something, accept it and move on.

Despite the crowds¹, Comic-Con is exceedingly well organized from the standpoint of managing human traffic. Although at least one of the security policies was rather annoying², event lines were clearly marked and efficiently run. The interesting thing about those lines is CCCL #2: you don’t really get in line for an event, but really you are in line for the room. When a panel is over, the room is not forcibly cleared before the next one starts – it is entirely possible for most people attending a 10:00 panel to just stay for the 11:00 panel if they want to, meaning that very few new people would be allowed in, even if there were a lot of people waiting in line to see the 11:00 panel. Functionally, that means that waiting in line for a thing will not necessarily lead to you getting in to see that thing. On Sunday, we waited in line for two hours for an event that we missed because not enough people from the previous panel left the room for us to be allowed in. Some companions of ours waited to get into a room that had six events in a row they would have enjoyed seeing; after four and a half hours, things slowly cleared out enough so that they made it in the room to catch the last two.

This made me exceedingly pleased that I am not a rabid fan of any Media People Or Products On Display, because down that path would have lain sour disappointment if I missed something. Even though I waxed enthusiastic about all games Bioware last time, going to extreme lengths just to ensure I got into any associated events just wasn’t worth it. This leads us to CCCL #3: if there is something at Comic-Con you absolutely must see, plan ahead and make the time. The Sunday panel we missed was with the cast of the current Doctor Who series, and if we truly had a moral imperative to make it, we should have arrived thirty to sixty minutes earlier than we did. That said, it was no big loss, and I much prefer the chunk of extra sleep I partook in instead.

As to panels, we made it into several that were entertaining, if not incredibly newsworthy. Felicia Day and Dragon Age series writer David Gaider were the highlights of a session on the upcoming Dragon Age: Redemption web series, which looks to have cool potential. The Legendary Pictures event had the most star power, featuring Guillermo Del Toro enthusiastically discussing the upcoming kaiju apocalypse flick Pacific Rim³, and Jeff Bridges describing his role as a monster hunter who goes through apprentices at a disturbingly high rate in The Seventh Son⁴. A panel with author Christopher Moore was flat out hilarious, and it was interesting to hear how several colleges and at least one seminary use his novel Lamb: The Gospel According To Biff, Christ’s Childhood Pal as a positive teaching tool about the story of Jesus⁵. The “best worst panel of the con” was the one before Moore’s that we went to to guarantee ourselves seats, and was a spotlight on graphic novel innovator Jim Steranko. I could write a whole column on the disturbing epicness that was his stories, but for here I will note that he is a man who’s hair, ego, and tales are all equally amazing⁶. Finally, we made it into the Hasbro/Marvel toy line unveiling, which was mainly interesting to see the depth of investment and critique from hardcore collectors in the room⁷.

Of course, there was far more to the con than panels. The dealer’s room is a sprawling beast of a complex where everyone from major television channels and toy companies to independent artists and comics creators come to hawk their wares. It’s a significant task to navigate with all the people, and I certainly didn’t see all of it during my 4 days there. Additionally, many of the vendors have things to buy that are exclusive only to the convention and are there in limited numbers⁸ This makes CCCL #4: plan ahead for exclusives to buy, and who to see. Though I was ignorant of the exclusives before the start of the con, I did manage to get a few as gifts. Um, which weren’t all for me, I promise. Far more fulfillingly, I was able to meet and financially support many of the artists of webcomics that I read on a daily basis, which was truly excellent.

w00tstock was outstanding, and therefore CCCL #5 is that w00tstock is a can’t-miss event for anyone of a geeky persuasion. Wil Wheaton emceed what amounted to a three and a half hour variety show of music, comedy, and other skits that are hard to quantify, but highly entertaining. As with prior w00tstock events, it included a host of entertainers and special guests, prominently featuring musicians Paul and Storm as well as Adam Savage of Mythbusters fame. While it is an occasional year round traveling show, I expect that it will continue to to be a Comic-Con staple in future years.

Finally, I did make it to the Viva La Lucha! lucha libre show. As a fan of the gladiatorial craft of professional wrestling⁹, I can say that this was the best live wrestling event I’ve ever attended. 95% of the audience was Spanish-speaking, and it was a fun bit of cognitive dissonance that the entire thing was announced in Spanish and that any wrestler who spoke to the crowd in English was automatically on the side of evil. Not knowing who most of the wrestlers were or being able to understand what was said left only the the wrestlers’ in-ring performances (and some out-of-ring theatrics) to tell the stories involved, which was splendidly done. Several renowned lucha stars were present, including Solar (who started his wrestling career the year I was born – yikes – and can still seriously go in the ring) and the dancing, chair wielding L.A. Park. Between the quality of the wrestler’s work and their close interaction with an enthusiastic audience of 800 people, this is the type of wrestling show I wish more non-wrestling fans could see to better “get” what makes well-done pro wrestling a fascinating and cathartic storytelling medium.

So, would I go back to Comic-Con? Despite the fun I had, to go for the whole four day convention, especially without “I must do this or I will wail and gnash my teeth” goals, is an exhausting (not to mention, expensive) prospect that doesn’t seem worth it to repeat. Going back for a day or two, especially with a specific focus, seems more like it for any repeat visits. Comic-Con is about geek crass entertainment and commercialism on a truly epic scale, and as such is inherently a hollow thing. Ultimately, the best times of the con were those centered around experiences and shared with friends, which would have to be CCCL #6: go with those you enjoy. As with any gathering of like minded folk, that’s what truly matters.

That, and melty-faced Toht. Mmmm…

1. or, rather, because of them [↩]
2. On most days, security personnel were instructed to not let anyone stand or sit anywhere in the areas where panel rooms were, in order to keep lines organized and adhere to fire safety regulations. The challenge with this was that you weren’t able to pause and eat, or even rest, in those areas, because you would be told to “move along” by security… and unless you moved outside or to a different floor, you’d run into the same problem a minute or so later. [↩]
3. “It’s giant f**king monsters fighting giant f**king robots!” [↩]
4. Sadly, not that 7th Son. [↩]
5. If you haven’t read his novels Lamb and Fool, then do that. Now. [↩]
6. He built a zip gun in high school shop shop class to fight off a local gang. He trained with his fists so much that his knuckles developed knife-like edges, and he had a lady from the audience come up to feel them as proof. He can see normally in near darkness. He once destroyed a motorcycle gang with a Ford Pinto. [↩]
7. When it was announced that the Legends series of figures would have an improved hip articulation, a man in the audience immediately started screaming a repeated, high-pitched “THANK YOU!” to the panel of designers. [↩]
8. Hasbro, for instance, had several limited edition toys, including a 22 inch deluxe Optimus Prime Transformer and a special 8 pack of never-released Raiders of the Lost Ark action figures, including the German mechanic who gets hamburgered by the plane propeller, and Toht with both normal and “melty-face” heads. [↩]
9. Which makes me, by default, not much of a fan of boring trash that is routinely put on by the WWE. [↩]

Tags: John Cmar, San Diego Comic-Con, SDCC, vacation, Viva La Lucha!, w00tstock

This entry was posted on Friday, July 29th, 2011 at 12:00 pm and is filed under Memoranda. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.