May
12
Condolences to C.A. Sizemore
Filed Under Memoranda | Leave a Comment
C.A. Sizemore has been a fan of The Secret Lair since day one. He has provided us with feedback and even contributed a manuscript that we simply haven’t gotten around to publishing yet. C.A. has been with us since long before The Secret Lair became a reality: he followed us here from The House of the Harping Monkey and Volcanicast, where he was a loyal, involved fan. I’m hard-pressed to think of a podcast that C.A. doesn’t listen to and equally hard-pressed to think of a podcaster who doesn’t know him. He is the best kind of fan we could possibly ask for and we are all lucky to have him.
This morning C.A.’s wife, Kelly, passed away unexpectedly. Our hearts, thoughts, prayers and deepest condolences are with C.A. in this difficult and tragic time.
I’ve taken down the tip jar because there is something better you can do with your money today: you can give a little to help someone who has always been there for us, a loyal fan like no other. Please visit the donation site established by Mae Breakall and give what you can to help C.A. cover the expenses that tragic events like these always incur.
Popularity: 2% [?]
May
8
Due to an issue with the temporal warp units, the Overlords are unable to converse with you. Instead, BECKY, the AI which keeps order within the Lair, presents some original fiction: the fruit of the Overlords’ daily writing meetups at the café.
- In our first piece, The Monologue, Kris orates grandly before one of the many who have attempted to penetrate the Lair…and failed.
- Our second piece, entitled Serial, Chris tells a tale of boy meets girl…meets knife. NOTE: Not really for the kiddies, this one.
Popularity: 6% [?]
Apr
18
The Secret Lair Comic 0004: Fresh Out of Minions
Filed Under Comics | 4 Comments
Popularity: 25% [?]
Apr
17
The Secret Lair Episode 0010: What makes a good…ohh, shiny!
Filed Under Books, Introspection, Monologuing | 3 Comments
This episode of The Secret Lair was recorded in an unnamed coffeeshop somewhere in an eastern suburb of the largest city in northeastern Ohio. No baristas were harmed during the recording of this episode, but Kris did some serious damage to a blueberry muffin.
Your Overlords are Old Men or “Infirmateam Assemble!”
- Decaffeinated coffee? Non-dairy creamer? Artificial sweetener? Who wants to rule a world where such things exist?
- We do.
Turning Pages
- Chris has high praise for The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss, which was recently nominated for the Compton Crook Award.
- Kris is reading Elric of Melniboné by Michael Moorcock.
- We are still reading The Sky People by S.M. Stirling for The Secret Library. Kris is very nearly finished. Are you?
What Makes a Good Novel?
- Chris wants to be engrossed and transported.
- Chris likes the poetic style of the 1960’s. Poetic style doesn’t necessarily require the ingestion of psychotropic pharmaceuticals…but it can’t hurt.
- Chris would like Patrick Rothfuss to rewrite Robert Jordan’s entire Wheel of Time series. Bring on the hate mail.
- Chris prefers dialog to description.
- Chris says, “Tolkien was a hack.” I’m paraphrasing.
- Kris likes lighter fare; what he calls “beach novels” (see James Patterson’s Maximum Ride series).
- Kris also wants good description, something he feels is lacking in Laurell K. Hamilton’s Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter series.
- Chris wants a good mystery novel. The last one he read was by Ellis Peters (Brother Cadfael Mysteries).
Promo!
- Max Quick: Book Two - The Two Travellers by Mark Jeffrey premieres 01 May 2008 on Podiobooks.com. You can subscribe to Max Quick: Book One - The Pocket and The Pendant at Podiobooks.com, and you should: it’s the first podiobook selection for The Secret Library. More information on the series is available on the official web site.
Books Into Movies
- Chris doesn’t think The Name of the Wind should be made into a movie; there’s simply too much that would not survive the translation.
- Kris thinks that translating Perfume: The Story of a Murderer by Patrick Süskind to film was ill-advised.
- Kris also hopes that there are no plans to adapt Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides to film.
- Chris wanders off into Touchy-Feely Land for a few minutes. Someone give that man a hug.
- …aaaand we’re back. Kris is glad Jurassic Park made the jump from pulp and ink to celluloid.
Evil Experiments
- The overlords will be meeting each morning at a local coffeeshop for more decaf, powdered non-milk and aspartame.
- And writing.
- Chris wants to write flash fiction.
- Kris wants to write a horror story based on his exposure to countless hours of children’s television. There’s an animal in trouble somewhere.
- During our daily writing experiments, we will likely make use of resources like Plotstorming.com.
Miscellanea
- Batman & Robin: Clooney had rigidity issues.
- Kris ruins The Empire Strikes Back for everyone.
- Wesley Clifford: not human? You decide.
Lairkeeping
- Thank you to Zach from the Geek Survival Guide for beta-testing our new feedback e-mail address. We welcome your feedback. At The Secret Lair. Dot Com.
- Be sure to visit our official community and The Secret Library.
- Our theme music is still provided by the extremely talented and well-bearded gentleman, Jonathan Coulton.
Popularity: 26% [?]
Apr
10
The Secret Lair Episode 0009: No Fools Allowed
Filed Under Books, Games, Introspection, Monologuing, Software, Villainy | 4 Comments
Due to an unfortunate accident, The Secret Lair’s official stenographer was eaten by a crocodile last week.1 While our search for a replacement continues, it has fallen to me to provide show notes for The Secret Lair Episode 0009.2 Unfortunately, I’m a very busy overlord lately and rather than delay release of the episode and further,3 I’m going to post the scraps4 I’ve got now and fill in the rest once I get an hour or so to myself.
April Fool’s Day
- Economic Stimulation Package. Did American Public Radio’s Marketplace play an April Fool’s Day joke on Chris?
- YouTube rickrolled everyone.
- So did Mahalo Daily.
- The Electronic Frontier Foundation is moving their headquarters.
- Twatr is an interesting new Twitter-clone…for your genitals.
- …has a new administrator interface. Chris isn’t a fan.
- …has a new image/media management system…which doesn’t seem to work on The Secret Lair.
- …has a redesigned Write Post screen. We don’t much care for it.
- Kris has more to say about WordPress 2.5 on his blog.
Unquiet Desperation
- Unquiet Desperation is an online poetry ‘zine.
- It is also Chris’ blog and podcast.
- Awkward!
Minion Recruiting Board
- Thanks to P.G. Holyfield and Scott Sigler, we have a number of job openings at the Lair.
- Fill out our super-secret minion application form, if you can find it.
- Our current novel is The Sky People by S.M. Stirling.
- Our current graphic novel is Shooting War by Anthony Lappé and Dan Goldman .
- NEW! At the request of our minions, we have decided to add a podiobook section to The Secret Library. Our first selection is The Pocket and the Pendant by Mark Jeffrey. Subscribe at Podiobooks.com.
RPGs
- The Dresden Files RPG bleeding edge beta continues.
- Gunnar scored some WarHammer RPG 2nd Edition sourcebooks and Half-Price Books recently.
Movies and Television
- Kris saw Spider-Man 3 and wishes he hadn’t.
- Chris says it was worse than Batman and Robin.
- Check out How It Should Have Ended. (YouTube)
- The Spectacular Spider-Man is on the Kids’ WB and is far more entertaining.
Housekeeping
- We have a feedback address, where you may send us feedback. At The Secret Lair. Dot Com.
- There’s also a contact form, which no one has used yet. Will you be the first?
- It is entirely possible to join our official community, should you be so inclined.
- Our theme music is “Skullcrusher Mountain” by Intertroubadour extraordinaire, Jonathan Coulton.
Popularity: 36% [?]
- Let’s not be concerned with who may or may not have forgotten to engage the magnetic couplers in the holding environment. Pointing fingers isn’t going to get us a new stenographer and playing The Blame Game isn’t helping morale. [↩]
- Writing the show notes is not punishment. As co-overlord, I’m above punishment, even if you could prove conclusively that it was me. Which you can’t. [↩]
- What’s that? Maybe I should have delayed release of the crocodile? Oh, great. That’s very mature. How about this: maybe you should think twice before you go hiring your relatives, okay? People get eaten, gassed, disintegrated, mutated and shunted to other dimensions around here all the time, but when it’s your cousin it’s suddenly a big deal. [↩]
- Shut up. Just shut up! [↩]
Mar
31
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For those of you that may not be aware of the man known as the Future Dark Overlord™ Scott Sigler, we at The Secret Lair do not endorse Scott’s most excellent sci-fi/horror novel Infected. Do not, I repeat, do not go out on April 1st and buy this very well written novel that can be found at all major bookstores. Doing so will only encourage him to keep making more awesome books and continue his quest to outshine the true overlords at this fine establishment.
Thank you for your cooperation,
-The Mgmt.
Popularity: 41% [?]
Mar
26
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Popularity: 45% [?]
Mar
22
The Secret Library: Market Forces by Richard K. Morgan
When we found Ed Dale roaming through the The Secret Library stacks in a daze, we naturally assumed that one of the test subjects from the Cerebral Transference Laboratory had wandered in after the Matter Phase-Shift Emitter prototype in the adjacent lab proved more powerful than we originally anticipated, rendering many of the walls and floors on three sublevels temporarily immaterial. It was only after a minion pointed out Mr. Dale’s lack of cranial sutures that we realized our misapprehension.
As it happens, Mr. Dale was seeking the discussion group for Market Forces by Richard K. Morgan. In a moment of uncommon benevolence, we decided to let Ed join in the discussion rather than turning him over to our new android librarian, who shushes noisy patrons with depleted uranium bullets and singularity grenades and collects overdue fees with a 7 gauge hypodermic needle.
The Discussion
- Also by Richard K. Morgan: the Takeshi Kovacs novels (Altered Carbon, Woken Furies)
- American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis
- “Along the Scenic Route” by Harlan Ellison, available in Deathbird Stories
- The Sound and the Fury and As I Lay Dying by William Faulkner
- The Acts of King Arthur and His Noble Knights by John Steinbeck
- Batman & Robin starring George Clooney and Chris McDonnell
- Zack Snyder (300) is directing the film version of Watchmen. Check out several characters in costume (including Ozymandias) on Zack Snyder’s production blog.
Addenda
- Laura’s complete review can be found at the official community discussion thread for Market Forces.
- Troy posted his thoughts on the book at GoodReads.com.
- The book inspired Ken Newquist to play Uncle Bear’s Toybox Wars. You can read Ken’s playtest review at Nuketown. If Ken knows what’s good for him, he’ll share his thoughts on the book in the comments section of this post, at the official community, or on the GoodReads group.
Chris’ Recent Reads
- The Retriever series (Staying Dead, Curse the Dark) by Laura Anne Gilman
- Programming Collective Intelligence: Building Smart Web 2.0 Applications by Toby Segaran
- Beautiful Code: Leading Programmers Explain How They Think edited by Andy Oram & Greg Wilson
Ed’s Recent Reads
- Natural Ordermage by L.E. Modesitt
- Collapse: How Societies Choose to Fail or Succeed by Jared Diamond
- Cauldron by Jack McDevitt
- The Southern Vampire Mysteries (Dead Until Dark, Living Dead in Dallas) by Charlaine Harris
- The Aisling Grey, Guardian series (You Slay Me, Fire Me Up, Light My Fire, Holy Smokes) by Katie MacAlister
Kris’ Recent Reads
- Spook Country by William Gibson
- The Scorpion’s Gate by Richard A. Clarke
- The Goon graphic novels by Eric Powell
- Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter: Guilty Pleasures, Vol. 1 by Laurell K. Hamilton
Series We Can’t Seem to Finish
- The Dark Tower by Stephen King
- The Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan
- The First Chronicles Of Thomas Covenant The Unbeliever (Lord Foul’s Bane, The Illearth War, The Power That Preserves) by Stephen R. Donaldson
- The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien
- Mission Earth by L. Ron Hubbard
Next Time on The Secret Library
Our next selection from The Secret Library comes to us courtesy of Ken Newquist, host of the Nuketown Radio Active podcast. Regular listeners will recall our interrogation of Mr. Newquist from Episode 0006, though it is highly unlikely that Mr. Newquist will.
Mr. Newquist has chosen The Sky People, by S.M. Stirling. Our intelligence reports indicate that the book is a combination of three genres that hold a strange allure to your overlords: alternate-history science fiction and pulp.
From the front flap of the hardcover edition:
Marc Vitrac was born in Louisiana in the early 1960s, about the time the first interplanetary probes delivered the news that Mars and Venus were teeming with life—even human life. At that point, the “Space Race” became the central preoccupation of the great powers of the world.
Now, in 1988, Marc has been assigned to Jamestown, the U.S.-Commonwealth base on Venus, near the great Venusian city of Kartahown. Set in a countryside swarming with sabertooths and dinosaurs, Jamestown is home to a small band of American and allied scientist-adventurers.
But there are flies in this ointment—and not only the Venusian dragonflies, with their yard-wide wings. The biologists studying Venus’s life are puzzled by the way it not only resembles that on Earth, but is virtually identical to it. The EastBloc has its own base at Cosmograd, in the highlands to the south, and relations are frosty. And attractive young geologist Cynthia Whitlock seems impervious to Marc’s Cajun charm.
Meanwhile, at the western end of the continent, Teesa of the Cloud Mountain People leads her tribe in a conflict with the Neanderthal-like beastmen who have seized her folk’s sacred caves. Then an EastBloc shuttle crashes nearby, and the beastmen acquire new knowledge…and AK-47s.
Jamestown sends its long-range blimp to rescue the downed EastBloc cosmonauts, little suspecting that the answer to the jungle planet’s mysteries may lie there, among tribal conflicts and traces of a power that made Earth’s vaunted science seem as primitive as the tribefolk’s blowguns. As if that weren’t enough, there’s an enemy agent on board the airship…
Minions in the new Dirigible Assault Division should note that The Sky People is required reading. We will be discussing the book sometime in May. Check out our community and official group on GoodReads to participate in the online discussion.
And another thing…
Thanks to Troy over at GoodReads, we have our first graphic novel selection: Shooting War by Anthony Lappé and Dan Goldman . This graphic novel was originally published as a serialized web comic, which was greatly expanded for the hardcover edition from Grand Central Publishing. The Eisner-nominated web comic is still available online.
Shooting War is the near-future story of Jimmy Burns, a video blogger who is in the right place at the wrong time and becomes an overnight Internet celebrity. Soon, Jimmy is blogging from a war-torn, occupied Iraq instead of the Starbucks around the corner.
The Secret Library Nominated Novels
- Sewer, Gas and Electric by Matt Ruff
- The Golden Globe by John Varley
- The World Without Us by Alan Weisman
The Secret Library Nominated Graphic Novels
- Dark Tower: The Gunslinger Born by Stephen King, Peter David, Robin Furth and Jae Lee
- Ex Machina: The First Hundred Days by Brian K. Vaughan and Tony Harris
- Hellboy: Seed of Destruction by Mike Mignola and John Byrne
Podcasts We Like
- Geek Radio Daily
- Stephen Fry’s Podgrams
- Secret Identity
Miscellany
- Brewed Fresh Daily, news and opinion from Cleveland, Ohio.
- Bitstrips is a site where you can create your own webcomics. The overlords suffer from “Boundless Creativity“.
- The Dresden Files roleplaying game is currently in beta. Chris recently played with some of the folks from The Game Master Show.
Congratulations
- To Scott Sigler, whose novel, Infected, will be available at Amazon.com on April 1.
- To Podiobooks author Seth Harwood whose novel, Jack Wakes Up is now available at Amazon.com.
- To Mur Lafferty, whose novella, Wasteland (Heaven Season Four) is now available at Podiobooks.com.
Special Thanks
- To our Secretary of Artistic Propaganda, Natalie Metzger, who continues to amaze us with her awesome art.
- To P.G. Holyfield, author of the audionovel Murder at Avadon Hill, who continues to befuddle and mock us.
- To The Vicar and Billy Flynn over at Geek Radio Daily, for spreading the love far and wide…and thick.
- To J.C. Hutchins for playing our promo on his recent UltraCreatives interview with Guy Kawasaki.
- To Jonathan Coulton, for our theme song, “Skullcrusher Mountain”.
- And finally, an extra special thank you to everyone who donated to our tip jar. The Zoom H2 mobile recorder is completely paid for! Official Henchman records will be updated shortly.
Popularity: 55% [?]
Mar
16
The Secret Lair Comic 0001: The Lair Gets a Pet
Filed Under Comics, Memoranda | 5 Comments
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Popularity: 53% [?]
Mar
4
The Secret Lair Episode 0007: Trapped in the Galley
Filed Under Books, Comics, Introspection | 5 Comments
Due to a problem with the security system, the Overlords are trapped inside the Secret Lair’s kitchen.
Show notes will be posted as soon as the laserdrill breaks through the vibranium doors.
- Minion #34720/B
Popularity: 63% [?]
From the Community- The Secret Library: The Sky People by S.M. Stirling
- Bitstrips.com
- The Secret Library: Shooting War by Anthony Lappé and Dan Goldman (Graphic Novel)
- The Secret Library: Market Forces by Richard K. Morgan
- Long Distance Role Playing
- Post-Potter Depression
- A Little Steampunk Music
- Recommendations on a good mobile rig?
- Someone is looking for you...
- Race for the Galaxy